Saturday, May 11, 2013

Modified Kubler Ross Model for Surgical Grief

 
Disclaimer:
Iam not responsible for what is following. This is a joke and in no ways meant to hurt the sentiments of any doctor/ profession/ institute/ patient/ or anybody or anything. Also, I do not take credit for this model. Iam just putting it up.
 
"Modified Kubler Ross Model for Surgical Grief"

What do surgeons do when they are confronted with a post-op patient of theirs who isn't doing as well as expected? They undergo the following stages-

  1. Cursing
    • !@#@$% "Why are you disturbing me? Iam tired from the long surgeries."
  2. Denial
    • "Who? My patient? No way... The operation went perfectly fine (read as patient came out of OT alive!) You got to be kidding me! He is fine and you are wrong (whatever it is you are trying to tell me- Iam not listening."
  3. Anger (read as cursing under breath)
  4. Bargaining
    • "Listen, why don't we try to cover this up..." (actually this stage never happens. Skip to 4)
  5. Acceptance
    • "The operation didn't go well. Lets do some more tests and correct it before it is too late."
  6. Depression
    • "My spic-n-span rates are dropping... Nobody will come to me for surgeries anymore."
  7. Cursing!
    • !#@#@#$@ "Why did this have to happen to me?"
Read Disclaimer again!